i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
