Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
