I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize