he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
