guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
