We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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