He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
