wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Randomize
