I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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