You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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