She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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