I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
