It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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