weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
