we should wear snuggies to the strip club
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize