did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
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