Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
