She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
