; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
