Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
