she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
