How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
