So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
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