none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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