stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
