I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
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