She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Can I color on your dick again?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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