Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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