im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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