Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
