even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
