I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
