I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
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