She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize