it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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