Midget sex pt 2 tonight
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
It's just like the Real World with babies
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
