Well douche your snatch and let's go!
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
