I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
