i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Maybe he injected his testicle?
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Randomize
