Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
