carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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