I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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