Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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