WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
