I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
