Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize