He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
