I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
