We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
