Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
