I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
It's never too late to be topless.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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